Please tell me you didn't think I was going to show you!!
PERVERT!!
I'm just saying that some girls flash their boobies for strands of beads.
Some do it for the chance to dance on Jerry Springer's pole.
Others are too drunk to think their father's might be watching the Girls' Gone Wild commercial at 2am!
In my case...
I flash mine for blog awards of course!
And they must be pretty fucking special 'cause I got me some!!
Be jealous!
And no...
I will no flash you to get your
made-up-so-i-can-see-boobies-creeper award.
I will no flash you to get your
made-up-so-i-can-see-boobies-creeper award.
We're talking important people here!
The people who give ME awards are pretty fucking special
(and are always too drunk to get a clear photograph!)
And to all those slackers out there who aren't giving me awards for my fabulousness...
BOO ON YOU!!!
That's because I slipped some special mushrooms in her morning coffee!
I'm glad someone does because I sure as hell don't read it!
Being a skank is certainly not a crime in this family!
And I don't want to hear about how you've got more,
your page is bigger,
you'll make me famous,
or blah blah blah...
much like my drinks,
I expect my awards to come with no strings
Just consider yourself lucky my perfume wafted in your general direction.
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And no matter how far down you scroll...
I'm still not showing you my tits!
