Wednesday, June 9, 2010

My day off...

Well... sort of.

We had a 7 pm meeting at work.  Mandatory!  Failure to appear would result in disciplinary actions... because I'm really concerned about a 'black mark' on my hotel housekeeping record!

(and before I forget, you can all thank Momma Fargo for breaking the blog silence by placing her BloggersAward vote!  The rest of you are slackers!  You officially fail and are being forced to repeat the entire course!)
But anyway... since work was accommodating enough to allow my 3-year-old to attend, I showed up.  With bells on!  Not literally... but do you know how often I actually get out of the house these days? 

Zero... zilch... nada! 

I have an entire wardrobe of clothes, shoes, purses, etc... that I LOVE!  Unfortunately, 5 days a week I'm stuck in black slacks and a comfortable shirt covered by a hideous French Maid smock!  I get ready for work in 15 minutes.  There's no point in makeup unless I want to look like The Joker after 6 hours of cleaning dirty showers and wiping sweat from my brow.

And on my days off... pajamas!  If you're lucky and I intend to drown in the humidity outside, I might put on a pair of capris.

So... OMG!!  I'm getting out of the house... in public... in town (as opposed to the city park).  Whatever will I wear?!?!?!?!?!

A bright fuchsia shirt,
grey slacks...

I'm starting to get bothered here...


Oh... and did I stop there?

I popped on the fuchsia eye shadow!
Bright lipstick!
(oh yes, I totally did!)
My diamond ring and my emeralds! 
(no cheap summer costume jewelry here.  This shit's from Zales!)

That's right... I was rocking it!
And my best girl totally noticed... because she always does
(I love having lesbian friends!)

And after the meeting was over, I took the demonic angel to the park...  Did you know that my child can pick up an entire Estee Lauder handbag pull of toys AND put her shoes on in 30 seconds if you say the word "park!"  It was AMAZING!

Of course we didn't get there until 8:30, which really only leaves an hour to play before it's pitch black.  Despite it being a relatively safe town, once the last of the kid-toting adults started to clear out, that was this single white woman's cue to exit.  Post park we zipped over to JJ's to see the PC (and totally show off my HOTNESS!).  One lemonade later, PC made a sandwich to take to The Queen (because she's refusing to cook and we can't have her starving to death), so we jetted across town to see her before she started work.

The spawn could barely handle the visit with Grandma... she was so exhausted.  As we left the parking lot she randomly explained, "We're never going to get honey now!"  It took 4 stop lights before she explained that she liked honey because it was tasty.  (I'd love to live in her mind for about 60 seconds!)

Gas and cigarettes and we left town to the tune of "Twinkle twinkle wittle star..." followed 5 minutes later by, "Goodnight Mommy!"

But the REAL point of this post was this...
Why in the hell do companies insist on making their employees go to stupid training seminars when they could sum it up in maybe 2 sentences?  I'm not exaggerating here.  This was the entire meeting.
  1. 2 groups (older employees, newer employees)... Pop quiz!  Question #1... how many songs mention our business?  Answer... NOT EVEN CLOSE TO OURS!  4 more random and pointless questions.
  2. Worksheet: Circle all things you find important when communicating.  Answer... you're communication style.  (I could have told you that!)  Divide into groups by communication style.
  3. Exercise:  Plan a vacation for the entire staff, money is no object.  Result... each group made plans in the exact fashion that their communication style would indicate (this was actually very cool... but irrelevant!)
  4. Brainstorm:  What are the needs of our customers at different points in their hotel stay?  Answer:  THE OBVIOUS!  Kind, caring, considerate, hassle-free service.  They want to feel LOVED!
This seminar took 90 minutes!  Compare that to the 5 hours it is supposed to take (we love our manager!) and it's a bargain!  But compare that to the 5 minutes it could have been done in if this world wasn't filled with STUPID FUCKS and it's more than a minor irritation on my day off!  And certainly not worth a couple slices of half-assed pizza and the 32 cents I made after paying for gasoline!

But still!  It gave me a rare excuse to dress up and feel like the sexy MILF I am as opposed to a frumpy hotel maid!  And with that... we bring you the song of the day brought to you by Question #1...  ENJOY!


  1. At least you had a chance to dress up. Thanks for the peek into your little slice of heaven.

  2. Sounds like some rockin makeup! I wear the same damn makeup everyday to work, sometimes none at all, and I have all of this beautiful Sephora makeup piling up on my desk and I keep buying more, but I'm not using it...I'm just too damn tired and lazy in the mornings before work to get really creative with it! And then, almost no matter what, the damn eyeshadow creases so you gotta lug around all this makeup everywhere you go...*sigh*

  3. Love the imagine you have a lot of funny hotel stores.....

  4. Bitch, you're so hot! Even in PJ's hooker!!!

  5. and I loved the sandwich.... it was great.. had it for breakfast before I went to bed..and then had it for mid afternoon lunch .. when I woke up... tell PC thanks a bunch...

    Now.. I'm off to puke and shit! he he

  6. Mike - 'piece of heaven'... lmao... unnecessary meetings don't really fit into that picture. But getting to dress up, spend time with the kiddo and see my other 2 favorite people comes pretty close.

    Amber - I've sworn off buying makeup and bath products until I've put a dent in what I already own. If I don't start paying more attention to what I have it's going to get jealous and cause breakouts!

    Jo - if by 'funny' you mean, 'OMG! I've never worked in a business that involved so many drunk/stupid/dirty/rude people in my life... and I worked the bar-shift as a waitress!'... then yes... I have tons of funny stories :)

    CB - totally! I could rock a paper bag!

    Queen - glad you enjoyed it. Figured you'd get a couple of good meals out of it. Your son-in-law can't remember what kind of pizza I like, but he's made you one sandwich over 6 months ago and still remembered what you like! There's something messed up about that!